Strangely Familiar

I recognize this empty feeling
The hollowness that suddenly appears
I do try not to cry, though
That was my best effort to hold my tears

But the pain was strangely too familiar..

Cinta

Kekasihku,
Bolehkan aku memanggilmu cinta?
Hanya agar merasa damai
Sedikit saja, sedikit untukku
Biar resah ini menghilang

Kekasihku,
Izinkan aku memanggilmu cinta

Sekali ini saja

Jelaga Mimpi

Dia datang
Lalu memelukku
Tak berjanji, tidak pula ungkapkan cinta
Hanya berkata: tinggalkan aku
Bila seribu mimpi yang dia tawarkan
Boleh aku uraikan menjadi apapun yang ku mau
Maka jadilah ia: pelita
Aku beku, jadilah ia: hangat
Tidak, tidak kataku
Tapi inilah hatiku
Bukan tidak, katanya
Hanya, jangan bermimpi terjaga di sampingnya
Jangan dulu
Karena dia datang
Tapi belum tentu untukku

Aku Mau Dirayu

Rayu aku lagi
Seperti saat kita bermimpi
Dan dalam dekapmu
Dan dalam hela nafasmu
Dan seperti saat kita tertawa
Seperti saat aku tersenyum
Saat kau kecup aku
Seperti saat kau bilang, bukan selamat tinggal
Dan dalam harapan, yang kau minta ku enyahkan
Rayu aku lagi
Ketika aku sepi
Saat menangis diam-diam
Saat merasa mesra, tapi hampa
Saat rindu hanya tinggal biru
Dan dalam doaku
Dalam bisikan
Ketika angin malam mencumbu
Saat terjaga sampai pagi, seperti ini..

The Aftermath

I was singing 'Head Over Feet'
Though I wasn't too sure
But I kept repeating the chorus
Until I feel like I believe it

These what if's in my head
These no's versus these ignorances
I sang to myself:
"I couldn't help it, it's all your fault"

Really, it was too good to be true
And indeed it is
We'll be too perfect
If there's such thing as perfect

So I just shove the hopes away
Not even try to find the reason why
You brave enough to came clean
And that's enough for me

'Cuz however it'll be too good to be true
However we'll be too perfect

Wrong

Did you laways have those sparks in your eyes?
Did you always smile like that?
Did you always listen to me that careful?
Did you always laugh so sweet?

I never know, I never know
I think I was too busy looking for somebody else
Or perhaps I was too afraid to notice
If you ever noticed me

Did you always look at me that way?
Did you ever talk to me and make us laugh like crazy?
Did we ever live in a universe of you and me before?
A place where our conversation never went dry?

I didn't know, I didn't know
I guess I was too busy understanding somebody else
While all I need were never too far away
Not too hard to find if I wasn't try too hard

And when I'm aware of the butterflies in my stomach
All I can do is cursing the time
And wondering if she feels a slight of jealousy
When you mentioned my name

I am now trapped, and perfectly lost in your flirts
They were so flirtous almost like a joke
Or is it nothing more serious than merely a joke?
I need to know, I need to know

'Cuz even if this is so wrong
I've never felt so right like this for quite some times ..

And Then...

There will always be shadows
Even on the sunniest day..

There's No Such Things

No such things
As perfect love
Or match made in heaven
No such things
As wait forever
And here for you always
And definitely there is nothing
Like forgive and forget
So put the second chance behind
Because although there’s no such things as letting go completely,
But move on does exist.

Relapse Eps. 2

On the couch, in his arms.
Under the jackfruit tree, between the laughter.
In the house of memories, when I cried.
Behind the silent wall, with sweet kisses.

Shouted.
Low voice.
Murmured.
Pronounced clearly.
Seriously spoken.
Teasing tone.
Courageously uttered.
Whispered carefully.

It’s all felt the same when he said, “You’re the one I need”.

Rindu #02

Duhai wanita panutan
Kekasih Sang Manusia Terpilih
Akhlakmu adalah tempat belajarku
Karena ingin kupahami hidup, seperti kau simpulkan semua dalam langkahmu..

Rindu #01

Tadi malam
Aku bersimpuh
Kusadari rinduku masih menggebu
Dan kuyakin rinduku akan selalu menggebu

Untuk cinta yang tak terukur dalamnya..

You Name It.

If the word love can be replaced
I don’t want to call it love
Love is a strong word
And I’d rather ignore the thrust

I’m so scared to fall again
Because falling can break me down
Yet I don’t want this admiration to stop
Yes it’s funny, and hazy, and enhancing

I said to myself over and over again
To be very careful with my flimsy heart
I’ve learnt to hide my feelings
And I guess I’ve been too good at it

Conversely, I want to share the things
That’s been pestering me
Since the moment I realize
Your smile brightens up my day

I’ll say no more
Because it will only get more confusing
But those fascinating small eyes
Just won’t let me over you

Yeayeah

Lupakah kamu
Kamupun pernah ucapkan cinta padaku
Meski tak kamu umumkan pada dunia
Tapi kamu bilang tak ada yang seperti aku?

Dan mungkin masih ada diingatanmu
Kata-kata yang kamu rangkai menjadi janji
Lalu kamu lemparkan ke tong sampah
di awal bulan Juli?

Aku tahu
Aku ingat

Dan aku tak terluka
Bila itu maksudmu ketika berkata
Kamu jatuh cinta pada gadis lain
Karena jatuh cinta bukanlah hal terbaik yang bisa kamu lakukan

Sejauh aku tahu,
kamu cuma hebat dalam berdusta

- 010107 -

Ciao

Itulah ujungnya
Aku memutuskan untuk pergi
Tanpa dusta atau pura-pura
Aku tinggalkan semua
Dan berkata ini tlah usai
Karena tentangmu dan untukmu
Yang tersisa hanya kepastian:
Aku salah pernah memilihmu
(Bukan, bukan aku yang menjadi kesalahanmu)

Kamu tidak lagi
Dan tak akan pernah lagi
Istimewa.

- 010107 -

Not Yet

Hey Mr. Smart Man!
Don’t break me down yet
Not now
Not before I dare to say ‘Hello’ to you

Please be patient cuz I’m still pulling my guts together

Queensland in General

You, me
Holding hands
Sometime, somehow
We’ll have a date in Queensland

You Said You'd Stay

Is it too much to ask for
A little space that used to be mine
A little place inside called heart
A spot that once belongs to me

I promise this time I’ll be patient
And I’ll make sure you’ll listen
I’ll trust every lie you claim as the truth
I promise I’ll be nice, I’ll be very quiet

Don’t shake your head
Don’t say you’ll thinking it over

I just need you to keep your promise
Cuz I’ve been holding on to your words
And you said you’d stay
Next to me, you’d stay

I hate to cry, I hate the drama
I don’t want to be mushy and all
Life has been pretty hard
You don’t need to hurt me this way

Don’t sigh, don’t raise your eyebrow
Don’t hold my hand and say you’re sorry

After all I just hope you keep your promise
And with all the words I have faith in
Is there any chance for you to stay?
Cuz some time ago you said you’d stay..

Shallow Man

I said I’ve done with you
But things keep coming back
Over and again in an endless way
I need to get through it

There’s something stuck in my mind
The way you don’t treat me right
And how I want to scream to you
The words I’ve been kept

You won’t ask for forgiveness, I know
You might don’t care at all

No matter how much I hate you
No more hellos, not even a smile
No matter how ugly things go
You just won’t get it
Not in a zillion way

This could be one chance
To make you bleed to death
And you might die slowly
But is it worth to try?

Cuz I have the companion
I even have the whole troop
Or should I just let it pass
And drain my mind away?

You’re too shallow to understand, that’s for sure
But still I’ll spare your life

Even if I detest you
And no more hellos, no more smiles
Until everything gets dreadful
You still won’t get it
Not in a zillion way

The Drought

There are the times
When nothing happens
Surrounded by silence
Alone and lonely

P e r f e c t l y s i n g l e

But however,
there will always be the deluge afterward..

...dia cantik sekali

dia tersenyum
dan dunia bersinar bersama binar di matanya
lalu tawanya yang manis
seperti nyanyian matahari di awal pagi

tersentuh kulitnya, lembut
ingin dan ingin lagi bersamanya
dialah sahabat dan cinta
sempurna seputih salju
sederhana seperti embun

dan setelah kau ceritakan semua itu
kau bilang,
dia cantik sekali

maka akupun patah hati..


-sometimes we just have to let go and face it all–

The Pianist

There is some happiness that couldn’t be owned
Certain happiness that wouldn’t be possessed
The ones that remain only as ecstatic thoughts
Or as a silent sigh when the memories evoked

Like those mesmerizing small eyes,
that adorable mysterious smile,
and the gentle tone on his words
Or even the way he blends himself into the music he plays

Those were the joy I can only dream about
Admiration from distance
Feel it in my melting heart
But not in my longing arms

He’s gorgeous
And I’m blissful just to consented to know him